


Let Them Eat Cake

by the_random_writer



Category: Cut & Run - Madeleine Urban & Abigail Roux
Genre: Accidents, Arguing, Baking, Cats, Domestic Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-24
Updated: 2017-03-24
Packaged: 2018-10-10 03:38:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10428285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_random_writer/pseuds/the_random_writer
Summary: Ty should pay much closer attention to what he puts in his cakes.Inspired by one of the photos in thisTumbr post.





	

Zane jammed his hands on his hips, scanned around the kitchen and frowned. "You seen my new reading glasses?" he asked.

"Saw them in the bathroom this morning," Ty replied, making a quick but fruitless search of his own. "Don't think I've seen them since."

"Could've _sworn_ I left them right here," Zane muttered, laying a hand on the counter across from the fridge.

Ty grinned, wiped up some sugar and flour, then turned to rinse out his cloth in the sink. "You sure you didn't throw them in the laundry basket again?"

Zane huffed. "That was _one_ time," he reminded his spouse.

"Yeah, except the time before that, you spent half an hour looking everywhere for them when they were sitting on top of your goddamn head."

"That was a very stressful morning," Zane protested. "Some asshole had woken me up in the middle of the night, shouting about the mutant squirrel waving its giant balls in his face."

"Should buy you one of those spectacle chains, so you can hang them around your neck," Ty proposed, wisely ignoring his husband's complaint.

Zane snorted and headed towards the stairs. He didn't _think_ he'd thrown his glasses into the basket with his boxers and tees, but it certainly couldn't hurt to check.

He was back in the kitchen ten minutes later, having scoured both of the upper floors.

"You find them?" Ty asked.

Zane shook his head. "Looked everywhere for them. God only knows where the hell I've left them this time."

"You haven't left the house today yet, so they've gotta be in the building somewhere," Ty helpfully pointed out. "They'll turn up eventually."

As he finished speaking, the timer on the oven binged. Ty grabbed a towel from the hook, carefully cracked the oven door and gently extracted a nine-inch-long, rectangular tin—a tin which contained his first ever attempt at baking a loaf-style cake. Beaming with pride, he turned to set the tin on the rack.

Zane made an approving sound. The cake looked and smelled absolutely delicious. "Nice job, doll. What kind of cake did you say it was?"

"Something called Madeira Cake," Ty revealed. "My grandma Parnell's recipe. Mom swears it's the best cake she's ever had."

"Is that what we're having for breakfast?" Zane asked, thinking how nicely a slice would go with a large mug of his favourite brew.

Ty nodded and leaned in close to inspect his delicious creation. He rested his fingers on the surface, then winced and quickly snatched them away. "Yeah, but we might need to wait a while for it to cool. Bit too hot to eat right now."

Zane shrugged. "I'm in no hurry. Good things come to those who can wait."

"Why don't you go for your shower?" the newly-minted baker proposed. "I'll make your coffee for you as well, should be brewed by the time you're all done."

"Aww, thanks, doll," Zane murmured. He leaned in to brush his lips across Ty's cheek. "You're the best."

Ty snickered. "Remember that the next time I do something monumentally stupid." He slapped Zane firmly on the ass and waved him towards the stairs. "Go wash," he commanded. "You wanna eat cake, you gotta be clean."

********************

With slightly moist hair and very bare feet, Zane strolled back into the kitchen just as Ty was decanting the loaf.

The heavenly scent that greeted him was almost enough to make him drool. It wouldn't be the healthiest of breakfast options, but Zane didn't care.

Ty manoeuvered the cake-loaf onto a plate, extracted a slicing knife from the drawer, then set the blade on top of the sponge, roughly half an inch from the end. "That enough?" he said to Zane, eyebrows raised.

Zane waved the knife further in. "Bit more, keep going, keep going, okay stop," he finally said when the knife reached the two-inch mark.

"On your love handles be it," Ty warned with a grin, pushing the knife into the sponge. "Remind me to make you work it off later."

Something inside the loaf crunched.

_Very_ loudly.

Ty frowned and held his hand. "The fuck was that?"

"Jesus, Meow Mix, please tell me you didn't put a _whole_ egg in the cake batter again?" Zane asked, his lips curling in amusement. They'd long since learned the hard way that, when it came to following recipes, Ty had a very literal style.

"What was it you said twenty minutes ago about something only happening one time?" Ty grumbled back. "And even if I had, I'm pretty sure an egg shell wouldn't crunch as loudly as _that_." He set the knife down on the counter and carefully peeled the end of the loaf away, looking for the source of the noise. His eyes went wide in a mixture of shock and fear. "Oh, _shit_ ," he muttered.

"What's wrong?" Zane demanded. "Has something gone wrong with the cake?"

"Umm, that's one way to put it, yeah."

"What is it?" Zane asked.

"You know how you couldn't find your reading glasses?"

"Yeah?"

Ty attempted a placating smile. "Well, I think I just found 'em for you," he said, turning the loaf around. There, embedded right through the heart of the sponge was a very shiny, very expensive and very cooked pair of Calvin Kleins.

"How the fuck did my reading glasses end up in your goddamn cake?" Zane almost screeched, snatching the loaf out of his husband's hands.

"Why the hell are you asking me?" Ty hollered back. "They're _your_ fucking reading glasses, not mine!"

As carefully as he could, Zane peeled the rest of the sponge away.

Ty huffed and rubbed the back of his neck. "You're ruining my cake, man."

Zane said nothing, but shot his husband a frosty glare and continued peeling until he'd freed his spectacles from their golden, sugary trap. They were ruined. Absolutely, _totally_ ruined. The delicate frames had warped, and the plastic lenses had melted into twisted blobs.

Zane let out a strangled groan. "Jesus, Ty, these cost me almost five hundred bucks, and I only got them a couple of months ago."

"Should be more careful where you damn well leave them, then, shouldn't you?"

"Why the _hell_ would I leave my reading glasses in a goddamn cake tin?"

"I don't know, Zane," Ty thundered back. "There's no logical reason on God's green earth to put them in a laundry basket, either, but you did _that_ , didn't you?"

"That was different!"

"How?"

"I don't know," Zane shouted. "It just _was_ , okay?" He thrust the mangled remains of the loaf at Ty. "Here," he spat. "Take your fucking cake." Still holding the glasses, he stomped away in search of a pair of socks and some shoes.

"Where the hell are you going now?" Ty called out after him.

"To buy a new goddamn pair of glasses," was Zane's angry reply. "Seeing as how my drooling idiot of a husband just ruined the only pair I had!"

"Oh, yeah? Well, make sure you order them in a nice shade of 'Go Fuck Yourself' grey!"

******************** 

Zane was back at the house an hour or so later, an order for a new pair of reading glasses in hand. When he stepped through the door, Ty was lying along the couch with Cricket curled up in a ball on his chest and Jiminy wedged between his shins. He didn't have to be telepathic to know his husband was really annoyed.

"I'm sorry I shouted at you," Zane said in a quiet voice. "When I was at the opticians, I remembered I wasn't really paying attention when I put my glasses down on the counter, so it's possible I dropped them in the cake tin instead."

Ty snorted. "Not like I did any better," he calmly acknowledged. "You might have put them in the tin, but I was the one who poured in the batter, so I'm not exactly earning points for observational powers, either."

"Don't suppose you want to bake up another loaf?" Zane suggested, slipping out of his coat and his shoes.

Ty sat up, but very slowly, gently urging the cat on his chest to find another place to sleep. Cricket grumfed as her comfortable bed disappeared from underneath her, gave her human an evil glare, then hopped to the other side of the couch to curl up with her brother instead.

Ty sighed and scratched his chest. "How about I make it tomorrow morning instead?" he proposed. "Not really in the mood for cake right now."

"Sorry, doll. Didn't mean to kill off your baking buzz."

"It's not that."

Zane cocked a curious brow. "What, then?"

"If I eat another piece of cake, I'm gonna be sick," Ty explained. Right on cue, his stomach emitted an ominous growl.

"What the hell do you mean, _another_ piece?" Zane demanded. Comprehension suddenly dawned. "You ate what was left of that loaf, didn't you?"

"You bet your grass-fed, Texan ass I did," Ty hotly retorted. "First damn cake I'd ever made. You think I was gonna throw the rest of it into the trash just because I baked a pair of your glasses in it?" He shrugged slightly. "Not like the frames were made of arsenic and lead."

"You greedy bastard!"

"Says the man who wanted to cut a slice thick enough to use as a roof."

"What can I say? It looked like a really nice cake."

"It was," Ty confirmed. His tone softened again and he smiled. "I'll make another one tomorrow, babe. Just for you. _And_ a pot of coffee as well."

"Just let me do a sweep of the kitchen before you start, make sure my keys and my phone are both out of harm's way."

"You're funny."

"Course I am."

Ty grunted and rolled his eyes. "And so modest, too," he muttered, reaching over to give Cricket a consolatory scratch on the head.

"Speaking of modesty," Zane started, "did you go for your shower yet?"

Ty nodded. "Half an hour ago, yeah."

"That's a shame."

"Why?"

"If you hadn't, I _was_ gonna make things up to you by offering to wash your back."

"You _are_ always telling me what a dirty bastard I am."

"Yeah, so?" Zane asked, thinking that was normally in the heat of the moment, based on what Ty was doing to him at the time. Usually something involving his fingers or mouth.

Ty grinned and flashed his brows. "So, maybe when you're a dirty bastard, one shower just isn't enough?"


End file.
